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THE RDOS KARMA IS A BITCH.

By Kyle Bauer

THE SAINTS LOSE! THE SAINTS LOSE! THHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEE SAAAAAAAAAAAINTS LOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Their redneck fans shot up a TV in celebration. They tried to mess with Detroit. Now they’re falling apart.

The Saints choked against the Buccaneers, leading 17-10, when Michael Spurlock had a 77 yard punt return at the two-minute warning. New Orleans charged back down the field but they managed to choke again! Kicker Garrett Hartley missed a makeable 37 yard field goal. In overtime the Saints folded like a tent in a hurricane and the Bucs Conor Barth sealed the upset with a 47 yard field goal.

Not only is this good because I have officially declared the Saints and their fan base fraudulent and evil but this has positive implications for the Lions and their draft position. The Lions are in a spot, assuming they lose out, that they will draft second behind the Rams. The Rams are in dire need for a quarterback and possibly might not take Ndamkong Suh. If the Rams pull an upset against Arizona or beat the 49ers, which is possible since neither of those teams have anything to play for, the Lions will have the number one pick.

Could the most embarrassing loss in Lions history end up being a positive?

Naw, the Lions will fuck this up somehow. The cynicism is an old bit, but so is three wins in three years.

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I’m not going to title this entry “how ’bout them Cowboys!”

By Kyle Bauer

Glad to see that my update last night fired the Cowboys up and it lead them to a stunning upset of the Saints.

Yes, I like to think that the Cowboys read the post below yesterday and it fired them up. I imagine everyone huddled around Tashard Choice’s lap top at his locker.

Marion Barber read it and said “HEY WHAT THE FUCK! That’s shitty of the Saints. Look how stupid these fans are! I’M ACTUALLY NOT GOING TO BE AN UNDERACHIEVING SCRUB FOR ONE GAME AND LEAD THIS TEAM FOR DETROIT!”

Then DeMarcus Ware wasn’t going to play, but he read the blog. Ware began to “hulk up” and stormed into Wade Phillips office, demanding to play, telling him that he was going to get a sack and a forced fumble. The sack will be for Detroit, the forced fumble will be for the Real Deal on Sports!

Tony Romo looked in the mirror and said “hey this paper boy hat looks fucking stupid. And maybe I shouldn’t be a pussy and blow another big game. Not only am I going to take off this stupid hat and put on a real one, I’m going to go out there and dominate!

The instance of Tony Romo may or may not have been related to yesterdays blog post.

I’m just happy to contribute to the deconstruction of the New Orleans Saints. Funny how the Cowboys still tried to go Cowboys and choke that away. The RDOS karma was just too strong though.

Now I can go back to hating the Cowboys. Especially because with one win, apparently they are suddenly Super Bowl contenders again. Thanks for the integrity Keyshawn Johnson!

Continue to be a “Real American” and ‘hulk up’ by visiting realdealonsports.com

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IS THIS REAL?!?!?!?!!?!?!!!

By Kyle Bauer

……


………

I am horrified.

Lets point out the disturbing stereotypical themes…

The amount of guns.

The amount of semi-automatic weaponry. Guns that I thought were only used in war.

The amount of booze.

The amount of trucks.

The amount of broken and indecipherable “english”.

The cut off jeans with zoo pants underneath.

The children firing those guns openly with ease.

I have a feeling these “people” spent everything they owned on guns and new  Saints jerseys.

In the middle of a crippling recession, I just watched 20 drunken rednecks destroy a 2,000+dollar television.

Speaking of which, how about this dumbass betting on the fucking Redskins to beat an undefeated New Oreleans team. This idiot is lucky that this game even went into overtime. He essentially almost pulled off  betting against the Harlem Globetrotters.

Now I want the Saints to crash and burn. Now I wish the Saints had moved to San Antonio or (Oklahoma City) after Katrina. I wont be able to sleep after every Saints win now. I wont sleep tonight.

THESE PEOPLE LIVE IN THE SAME COUNTRY THAT I DO. IN A SENSE, WE SHARE LAND. WE ARE SOMEHOW AFFILIATED.

Hmmm I need to get some of my “FB Friends” together next Sunday and watch some more quality NFL action.

Keep drinking.