Ron Washington believes in the powder game


By Kyle Bauer

Today Texas Rangers manager Ron Washington held a press conference to announce that he failed an MLB drug test for cocaine.

I don’t have too many silly jokes about this. Really the best joke I had I used up in the headline. This does open a window for me to finally get out my belief that Ron Washington is the BLACK JIM LEYLAND.

Maybe it’s just the mustaches. Maybe it’s just the old. Maybe it’s just the addiction; Leyland with cigarettes and Washington with cocaine. But they even preach similar styles, philosophically relying on the three-run-homerun. Both teams are void of consistent pitching and heavy on slow power hitters. To me, it’s kind of eerie.

Even the Rangers and Tigers copied the ‘have the youngest pitcher in the bullpen carry a pink backpack’ gimmick.

I really believe these men are in some way related. Hopefully Leyland doesnt fail a drug-test anytime soon.

Grassroots campaign!!!!!!!!!

No, this is’nt the Tea Party, this is far far far better.

The Real Deal on Sports  Township is looking to expand! Neal is leading a Facebook campaign to grow our up group to over 300 members. We would also enjoy an expansion of our fan page as well.

So if you come across this site and like what you see, JOIN THE PAGES! Seriously, every one blindly joins Facebook groups and fan pages, it wouldnt hurt to join ours.

Hit it up!

No longer looking up.

By Kyle Bauer

Out of the blue. That is a good way to describe team USA’s run to the gold medal game on multiple ways. 

No, I’m not going to make this some overplayed fluff about how this stunning series of events is going to ‘uplift the country in a time of need’ because it wont. This is hockey, and we live in a country that for some reason, cares more about figure skating than the game, the country north of us lives through.

For me this is big though. I thought the USA had the potential to surprise some people, I have been saying that all along. By that I meant maybe bronze. Never did I figure it would culminate to this point. That is part of what makes this great. Unlike some, I consider USA hockey a home team. A team that I will root as hard for as the Red Wings in game 7 of the Stanley Cup finals. Tomorrow is game 7 of the Stanley Cup finals in a sense, and thankfully Maxime Talbot just wasnt quite good enough to make team Canada. 

Whether I should or shouldnt, well I shouldnt, but I do live through the Tigers, Red Wings and every four years USA hockey. In a year that has seen the Lions continue their anemic ways, the Pistons reaching new lows in my lifetime, and the Red Wings staring up to missing the playoffs for the first time since I was two, USA hockey is saving me. Call that pathetic but that is the way I roll. 

For the United States, that many people might not care, especially in the grand scheme of things. What I look at in the big picture perspective is if these occurences inspire say 60 kids from various parts of this country to start watching and playing the game, then they fall in love with it the same way I did. If some 10 year old kid from Kentucky, watches the game rooting hard for the country he was socialized to root for, more than the team, he watches Patrick Kane score an awe-inspiring goal. He then goes to Wal-Mart and recognizes Kane on the cover on NHL 2010 with that stupid mouthguard hanging out. Recalling cheering for USA hockey in the olympics, he buys the game with his mothers credit card, giving her a nasty overage charge with 22% interest, but finding a different kind of interest in a game that was previously foreign to him.

My point wading through all this cheese is that USA being in this game, with new stars like Zach Parise, Patrick Kane, Ryan Kessler, Paul Stastny and Ryan Miller can only add intrigue and help grow the great game, that I so painfully watch be neglected at an astonishing level.

This may be “Canada’s game” ask a Canadian and they’ll tell you that, then you can punch their arrogant ass, but the US is coming up fast. This was a team that was not expected to compete for another four years. They weren’t supposed to beat Canada, let alone play them close. With the big win in the World Juniors, and the continuing presence of Hockey East, the CCHA, USHL and american players getting a fair shot in the CHL, USA hockey is an awoken giant. The program fell stagnant in the first half of the decade. A new breed of quick, powerful, creative, exciting american hockey player has ascended, and letting Canada know that they have company, not on the horizon but here, now.

While popularity of the game in this country is still in the sewer, it is slowly climbing back to the surface. Increased television ratings for stars like the afore-mentioned Kane, Parise and Miller and then Crosby, Ovechkin and Datsyuk are a positive sign. People in Detroit may hate Crosby but he is gaining viewers for the NHL and no one should hate that. This is the most exciting hockey has been since the height of its popularity in the late 80’s through the mid-90’s. If USA wins tomorrow, there may be actually a base for that win to build on in regards to growing the game, unlike the stale team that had a shot at gold in 2002 during a stale era for hockey.

The USA can win tomorrow by doing all the little things right. An early goal, a strong forecheck, getting in Canada’s shooting lanes, holding their line and owning the front of the net. But if they win, I believe they will be doing a big thing for my competitive psyche and a little thing for gaining respect as a sport in this country. At this point even a little thing is big to the USA hockey program.

Athletes Making Asses out of Themselves on Twitter

By Kyle Bauer

This installment is as good as it gets.

Today we have Jose Canseco. I dont need to fill you in on Jose. His well noted public actions have filled you in enough.

JoseCanseco– I am at fitness unlimited working out 16836 devonshire st granada hills great gym come by and check it out.


Seriously, would anything be better than watching Jose Canseco squat 560 pounds rocking a gold chain and a pair of Zoobas Pants?

Athletes making asses of themselves on Twitter

Today is Floyd Landis

The Real FlyodLShit! Fuck LNDD Fuck USADA Fuck J.Papp Fuck P.McQuaid Fuck T.Tygart and Fuck You!

…Possibly a hack but I doubt it.

I don’t know if this is connected to his recent issues or if he’s having ‘ROID RAGE’ but this is the greatest tweet ever.

51 days ago he posted this,

Planning something for 2010 that will change the cycling world forever!


Doubt it Flyod, doubt it.

This winner of the Real Deal on Sports Photoshop contest….


Is Sparty!

For this asstastic entry

He wins two tickets to see the Buffalo Sabres defeat the Red Wings, March 13th 7pm at Joe Louis Arena.

He also will receive a prized copy of Cool Runnings on VHS in honor of the Winter Olympics

Stay tuned for more RDOS contests and more great prizes to go with them!

Sparty, email me at for information on how to claim your prize!

The return of athletes making asses of themselves on twitter.

By Kyle Bauer

It’s baaaaaaack! After a hiatus from this popular feature, we return today with Vikings Offensive Lineman Bryant McKinnie.

Last week, I read a feature on McKinnie, and his behavior during the festivities at the Superbowl. Apparently McKinnie is so out of control, he was originally elected to the pro-bowl but was axed because the league was unable to get in contact with him to let him know in time!

His antics are best captured in an article by ESPN honk Dan Le Batard in the Miami Herald

The article referenced a rather confusing relationship that the NFL star has garnered with washed up whore and ex-convict Lil Kim.

The following post will leave you even more confused.

bigmacvikingsProducers while I still have Lil Kim with me send me some hot tracks. We been going thru songs all day. We went thru some last nite as well.

So uh is Bryant McKinnie starting a rap career and Lil Kim is producing for him?
Is he producing for Lil Kim?
Is she humoring him?
Is he simply listening to music and completely misinterpreting what Lil Kim’s purpose for him there was?
Well I know for sure he is banging her and he will have hepatitis soon…..and not the ‘good’ kind either….

McKinnie is becoming a hero of mine. Not only is he rapping and/ or producing with Lil Kim but you’ll see if you scroll further through his page, he is also attempting a tennis match vs. Venus Williams. Bryant McKinnie is proving to not only be a superior offensive lineman and partyer but a renaissance man.

The only thing left for him to do is attend hockey games with Rex Ryan.

He’s wearing a Big Dogs shirt everybody. A BIG DOGS SHIRT!

My Super Sunday. A diary of thoughts from Kyle Bauer.

By Kyle Bauer

Yesterday was a fantastic day for sport.  True there was Ovechkin showing up Crosby and I guess the Superbowl, but what I’m referring to is the celebrity sports challenges.

Yesterday was the Chris Paul Bowling Tournament, which featured Lamarr Woodley, Hines Ward, Jack DelRio, Ludacris and of course Paul himself. I didnt watch much of this but from what I did see it was the most horribly awkward event. Watching Ludacris being interviewed by bowling announcers was so off.  Of course they tried to drop some ‘SLANG’ on Luda and he wasnt having it. On top of that, they asked him the origins of his name. Is that hard to figure? Couldnt he just want to be called Ludacris for the sake of being called Ludacris? I wish he would had answered that.

The juxtaposition of NFL players and pro bowlers is always fun. Pro bowlers are by far the dorkiest bunch of schmucks on television. They all wear those stupid sponsored shirts, try to be ‘edgy’ (like Pete Weber) but at the end of the day, we know what pro bowlers are and that is a group of out of shape hacks who have mastered a hobbiest skill. To see their pressure and discomfort of trying to mingle with NFL and NBA players was near nerve racking. has the best coverage of this event.

Then there was litany of celebrity skiing and….uh poker playing….events on ABC following the Magic vs. Celtics game. I can’t tell you much about this because I can find no fallow up coverage online and I only watched like 10 minutes of it because I was busy getting ready for the party.

From what I did see, it was produced in the classic celebrity athletics event fashion. Similar to the Steve Garvey charity classics that I lol’d over so often on episodes of Cheap Seats (miss u Randy & Jay), there was an awful narration of the events by a guy who sounded similar to Buzz Brainard from This Week in Baseball, but sounded just different enough to where I knew it wasnt him. The delivery was slow and forced as he described Kathy Bates cross-country skiing, which I guess this was appropriate because obviously Kathy Bates doing is anything is slow and forced.

Then the cheap plugs began. Instead of running a commercial for the airline that transported celebrities the likes of Joe Pantoliano to Aspen and Calgary, they actually took about two minutes of the show, talking about how great the airline is and showing footage of the celebrities on the plane. Rather shameless but understandable.

I checked out when suddenly Alec Baldwin was playing poker. This left me confused on how they jumped from skiing to poker, so I shut it off in anger.

Despite my displeasure with something that had the potential to be beautifully cheesy, I still found more entertainment out of that than the Orlando-Boston game.

A couple other things that bothered me about yesterday was the predictable grandstanding by non-football fans using social websites to declare how they are better than you because they are not watching the Superbowl. Well….uh ok…..good the Superbowl doesn’t need your viewership anyways, they’re going to be fine.

There are multiple factions of people who carry on about this. In 2004 it was Livejournal. In 2005 and ’06 it was Myspace and over the past three years it has been these groups of people who have used Facebook to annoy me.

The first group that bitches about the Superbowl is the wannabe counter-culture revolutionary, who believes that the Superbowl is the worlds biggest display of capitalism, greed, corruption and american excess. Hmmmm, theyre actually right. But what gets me about their stance is that they are so passionate about it. By posting a Facebook status about how you hate the Superbowl and anyone who watches it is an idiot, what are you accomplishing? Listen, I know you need another cheap thrill to go along with you trying to ruin your families Memorial Day, Fourth of July, Thanksgiving and Christmas every year, and I know you’re different, but you and your cynical, brat-ass status updates are going to do nothing except display what a douche you are to your 326 friends. You’re not going to stop the Superbowl, your drum circle is not going to stop the Superbowl, if anything the Superbowl will one day stop you. And when you’re 36 and trying to make friends at the office, you’ll find yourself at a party pretending that you know the slightest about football while bandwagoning for some team and social acceptance.

The second group doesn’t bother me too much because I find genuine innocence behind their stance and that is women. If they want to watch the Puppy Bowl and post about how they are watching Puppy Bowl, that is fine with me. I am not going to lie, I have watched a little bit of the Puppy Bowl in the past, finding hilarious and adorable. To me the Puppy Bowl bears equivalence to the Superbowl in these peoples minds, so I do not have a problem with that. It’s honest passion, not trying to be different for the sake of being different and garner attention to yourself like the kids in the first group.

The third group irks me more than the first because of how hypocritical they are and that is soccer snob. This group will post about how they are not watching the Superbowl because they watch “real futbol”. Now I respect soccer and watch it when I can and I have said many times before, the ideal of soccer actually being called football makes a ton more sense than american football. That does not mean you need to turn up your nose and get on your soapbox about stupid american culture and the fanfare behind the event that is the Superbowl and how you’re proudly watching Inter Milan play Palermo to a 0-0 tie. I call their stance hypocritical because they pretend they’re above the riff-raff of NFL hype. Well soccer fan, you definitely are not. Remember that while you bitch about the Superbowl somehow getting in the way of your day-to-day life, the fucking World Cup is on the horizon and that is like six Superbowls rolled into one. Also there is the EURO which is like three Superbowls rolled into one. Then there is also the EUFA title match which doubles the ratings of the Superbowl. When these events occur, I watch, but if I didnt, I wouldn’t go on Facebook and declare that I am not watching a boring soccer game and anyone who watches is wasting their time, and then wait for the hate mail to pile in with a grin on my face. Worldwide, soccer dwarfs the NFL in ratings and also riots, to quote my co-host Neal Ruhl “that’s a fact.” So soccer fan should just calm the fuck down while they wrap on their celebratory scarves and rock some jersey with a corporation plastered all over it.

Those are the three groups who always put a crimp in my Superbowl Sunday, but ultimately it is all good. Another NFL season has passed and now I can wait until next year when I can bitch about more unwarranted hype, have to hear about another Favre return and the Lions will continue to hit new depths of futility.

Good riddance to all of this.

New contest at the Real Deal on Sports

In October of 2008, Mike Parsons and Kyle Bauer set out on an all-day adventure with each other. Their goal was to visit as many cider mills as they could in one day and rank and review them for Mike’s old food blog, Mike Eats Detroit. This was a very successful excursion. Along the way Kyle and Mike visited six cider mills, spanning Oakland Township to Brighton in five hours and they also rescued a stray dog!

But the day culminated when they got this caricature drawing done at Yates Cider Mills. They both figured it would be good for a chuckle….


Little did they know that it was “National Coming Out Day” and it left many people wondering.

Your mission is to do your best photoshop/ms paint/fireworks or any photo editing software job to this drawing, or add a caption. It can be subtle, it can be blatant. The hack job can along the lines of any theme or joke, just as long you make it funny.
The winner will be chosen next Thursday at noon and the winning picture/caption will be posted on the website and you will also get a sweet prize. We are going to divulge the prize when we announce the winner but trust me, it will be legit!

Post your submissions at in the Real Deal on Sports thread. Or if youre not a member and don’t feel like signing up, email your entry me at

Good luck, I look forward to seeing them!

Starting 5: Fantasy Basketball 1993

By Mike Parsons

A few weeks ago I was approached by a buddy at work about playing fantasy basketball. I declined at first citing that I had no clue when it came to “The Association”, other than the fact that Jim Rome calls it “The Association.” I was informed that the league would be “auto-draft” and not wanting to be left out of the gentle ball busting that brings dudes together at the office I decided what the hell. Low and behold after the first week and a half my team is full of players i’ve never heard of (except for that guy whose in the cell phone commercials with Charles Barkley) and sits atop the league standings (in all fairness hot office chick who picks her team based on who wears the prettiest costumes is not playing this year).

The only year I remember taking any interest in “The Association” was 1993, when I was 9, why? Because of NBA Jam. Imagine my dissapointment after turning on a game and seeing no flaming basketballs nor boom shaka-lakas from half court. I have a feeling that if I played fantasy basketball back in those days I’d be in first place and it would be no accident.

My starting 5



Horace Grant

By 1993 Michael Jordan was no longer a basketball player,

he was a brand which for one reason or another kept him out of the game.

The Bulls were Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippin;

In NBA Jam  Horace Grant was the other guy on the Bulls who wasn’t Scottie Pippin; therefore by default Horace Grant was Michael Jordan.




611852-larry_johnson_largeLarry Johnson

As a 9 year old name recognition and Jersey color

were key factors when picking a favorite player.

 Besides the Charlotte teal it actually turns out that Grandmama

 was this guy in a wig, amazing.

Plus Grandmama was on Urkel.






Harold Miner

“Baby Jordan” would be the guy you waste a high draft pick on who ends up crapping the bed once the season starts.

For some reason this guy was always in those “Superstars of the NBA” books I would buy at the 4th grade book fair but never seemed to be all that good.






manutebol_mugsyManute Bol

Simple logic would state: tall=good at basketball. Who was taller than Manute Bol? No one. Who was better than Manute Bol? Well alot of people.

This guy really should have been more of a cultural phenomenon than he was, “My Giant” should have been his movie Gheorghe Muersan was too “Princess Bride.” Drop Manute’s name in a casual conversation about basketball, it will get a laugh, guaranteed.







Bill Clinton

All you had to do was hold down L, Start and X after typing in the initials “ARK” and William Jefferson would show up on any team with all 10’s! (for the Super Nintendo)

My only hope is that I would have been #1 or 2 in the draft, theres no way a player with that skill set would have been left after the first two picks.